ATP

Imagine a 30 something man driving a vehicle with hard core dance music pounding out of the stereo...imagine this same man craning his neck at every woman he drives past...imagine one of his mates sitting behind him also looking at these girls...imagine then they are passing a mobile phone between the two of them and looking at text messages and listening to phone messages and calls...imagine that you're a passenger on the bus that he's driving...

This happens more frequently then is probably safe. However, the buses do have some redeeming features. Yes, it's true. They are much maligned and the recent transport strike has done nothing to help their plight, however, the bus transport system is regular, efficient (to a degree) and is far reaching. The buses range in age from Very Old to Very New. Don't ask me details – I'm a girl. Some look like they have been lifted directly from 1950s middle America (Old). Others look nice and shiny (new). The one thing...no, the two things that provide...actually the three things that mark them from other public transport systems is that the buses are all yellow, the cabs are all personalised in their own way – from shrines to the holy family to images of cars and children, and they are all driven with a reckless abandon that makes Formula 1 look like a Sunday drive with your grandfather. Everyone has a story to tell about a journey. It's a wonder that people get from A to B in one piece.

To ciao or not to ciao

I am in a bit of a quandary about this. Being so close to Italy the Maltese are prone to a bit of ciao-ing when they meet, in passing and on leaving. I'm of the 'when in Rome' brigade but I can't get over the pretentiousness that 'to ciao' acquired in Britain way back in the 80s and 90s. Rather awkwardly I have avoided reciprocating (and certainly not instigating) this greeting. But what do I do? Do I just get over my hang ups and ciao along with the rest of them or do I cringe, inwardly, every time I am greeted in this way and maintain a strict regimen of hellos, goodbyes and how DO you dos?

Language Schools

Off to Sliema to make sense of where these language schools are. Not a great deal of joy but did speak to a very helpful man who is director of a school. I have to try and find my A-level certificates. I can’t remember the last time anyone wanted to see one of those...if at all! I wonder if that’s going to be a problem. However, all is not lost.
We had lunch out and then it was back to the apartment. I had a faint glimmer of hope in the internet connection thing and managed to pick up an unsecured network – however, I was foiled at the final hurdle. I could probably hack into the files on whoever’s pc, but I can’t get a damn connection to my email! In this rather gung-ho attempt to achieve all of this I even climbed up on the roof and covered in sandstone. How frustrating not to have access.
Andrew has found his feet with the local boys. Lord knows what he’s up to, but he’s been fishing for a few hours.
The town is getting ready for their festa this weekend. Not sure, exactly, what it entails but fireworks or very loud explosions have been heard from neighbouring towns. Hopefully it’s fireworks at any rate.

Valletta

As my son embarks upon his Swallows and Amazons holiday I am left, in the late evening listening to the strains of ra-ra-rasputin, to reflect upon our day in Valetta. Valiant capital of all that is Malta. The prime motive for embarking upon this journey was to try and find a school that would hire me. And could I find a school let alone a job offer? No. Instead, after pouring over anglicised Maltese street names (why-oh-why-oh-why?) and trying to match them up with the street maps, I gave up. All roads seem to lead to Sliema though. That's where we're headed tomorrow. So after giving up on today we went to enjoy 'The Maltese Experience' as narrated by Sir Derek Jacoby. What an interesting experience that was. We were talked through about 3000000 years worth of history to the rounded vowels of Sir Derek. The Maltese Experience is multi-national and I wonder which stars of stage and screen narrated their countries translation. All I could hear beyond my headphones was German.
The boy has gone native and is mixing with the locals. Off fishing tonight he is with a net, rod and a knapsack on his back. If he comes back with a tattoo of a half-naked mermaid on his forearm I shall count myself lucky that he came back at all.
I'm off to read about Michael Palin's travels round eastern Europe.
I know that kung fu pandas are all the rage but on Malta it's The Shaolin, kung fu monks. They've been and gone, which is a shame, but they sure know how to cash in!

Marsaxlokk Fish Market

Marsaxlock Fish market. Got there about 9.00 and, much to my surprise, it wasn’t as busy as I was anticipating. We were able to walk around in relative comfort and look at all the dead and dying fish. Much the same could be said of the vegetables. We bought a few vegetables and also some langoustine – about 1 kilo. That’s supper for tonight! Got back to the apartment and read for a while as it was so damn not. The maltese do complain about the heat, which I find quite funny. We went to the beach at about 3.00. It was packed. My idea of holiday hell. The boy attempted some more fishing, but the fishys weren’t coming out to play. Don’t blame them myself.

Back at the apartment we sorted out supper with our earlier catch of the day. Then we promenaded around the harbour as the rest of Malta is wont to do. Sunday night is clearly the social evening of the week.

Relaxing...

Not such an early start but not bad all things considered – slept very well! Managed to get the bus the back of 9. Got a good spot on the beach, lost the boy for an hour as he went off in search of fishing gear, roasted for the morning with occasional plunges in the med. Quick beer in the shade and back to cooking in the sun. Somehow got conned into dabbling in the fine art of fishing. Some guy took pity on the boy and his feeble attempts at chucking some hooks in the water and showed him how to do it. No luck in the fish catching but, my god, he can chuck a mean line.

Back to Marsascala. For all the bus drivers have fallen foul of criticism after the recent strike we’ve been very lucky with paying/not paying. Is this a good thing? Morally should I feel bad about it? We’ve paid full fare once, half fare once and 1 free trip. Great! Went looking for a paper and milk. Ended up in what passes itself as a postoffice. Not so sure what this entails myself – but it sells a remarkable amount of ‘stuff’. The poor women in there were being barracked by a man. English. 70s. Comedian. You can imagine. Think Butlins, 1970s, where humour of a certain pedigree was once the mainstay of the British working classes. I smiled at one of the women who looked completely nonplussed by his mockney, sexist comments. I asked if he was a regular. She said he lived here. Oh dear I think I commented. Then the boy asked if we could get milk and eggs anywhere and would you believe it but another Englishman of a certain age happened to be in the shop at the moment and asked what we were after and offered us Colmans mustard as if it were contraband. I declined this most generous offer. Do I look like the sort of person who requires Colman’s Mustard ? Back to the apartment for a shower and siesta and then on to the balcony to try and finish the book I started about 2 days ago. The boy has been out fishing again, determined to catch the one that got away! About to meet him for supper. He’s hungry. It’s been a busy day for him.

Cats are almost revered on Malta. They run wild for the most part and are fed and watered by the locals. In England they wouldn’t be given this much care and attention! The boy takes great delight in watching the antics of the kittens across the way in some derelict land. I think he has names for some of them.
Sounds like some bombs are going off somewhere. Maybe it’s a festa.

Day 1

Slow start. Got more shopping in. The boy slept in, he must have been tired. Late afternoon we went to the beach in St Thomas Bay. Got more provisions and then had a rather lovely meal of pasta and a tomato sauce. Jolly good it was too. Out for desert and to sample the local wildlife. Then back to bed with promises of an early start and to the beach.

Last minute preparations...

How time flies! What exactly have I achieved today - my day off, my day of preparation for going away? Well, I've discovered that I'm either a)taking too much stuff or b) my suitcases aren't big enough. As a) is clearly not feasible it therefore must be b). According to Air Malta (and who makes up these silly rules anyway?) I can only take one piece of hand luggage and it seems that they're not joking about that! How am I meant to take a lap top AND a handbag? Where do business people put their lipstick? So, in the interest of trying to save space I've taken the toothpaste out of its cardboard box. You'd be amazed at how much space that's freed up. I've taken out two books also. My filofax has got fatter and fatter though. And NOOOOO that's not where I've put the books. I suddenly realised that I hadn't even packed my hairdryer. The space saving on the toothpaste box has been considerable! It remains to be seen if I can lift the case.

I'll worry about that in the morning.

I'm off to make my bed!

Day Off...ha ha

Well, today is the day when I can start packing and getting ready for tomorrow. School is finished. I managed to sleep in till 7.00 (still feel exhausted) and now I am faced with All The Things I Need To Do.

1. Packing
Clearly this is one of the most intrinsic things about going away. My mother glibly says 'oh but you don't need to take much'. 'A-hem, oh mother, have you NO idea?'
Gone are the days when one could simply throw in a swimming costume, a pair of shorts and a clean t-shirt. Malta is a small island. I can't POSSibly be seen in the same outfit twice. Someone may notice.

2. Toiletries
We already discussed this. Ready for all eventualities, who knows when a body souffle is going to be needed?

3. Money
This is causing me no small amount of grief. I am going to the postoffice to get all my money changed up to about 10.90 worth of Euros.

4. Paperwork
Don't know even where to begin regarding this. Ask me Friday when I'm there what happened.

...And relax...

Made it! Finally got through the day. Not too traumatic if truth be told, but then I've bailed out before it gets really frantic I feel!

So after I bailed I had to sort out the ole money. Scared myself by checking out the exchange rates. Can't believe how much it's come down. September last year it was about 1.35, February this year it was about 1.26 now it's barely 1.21. I shall be living on roadkill and dandelion leaves in malta. Do they even have dandelions out there? Will they be burnt to a crisp because of the heat? My summer of living the high life based on the exchange rate of last year is no more. I'll have to say goodbye to the spa days, goodbye to eating out everyday, goodbye to the little presents that I was going to bring back for everyone.

On top of organising things for when I'm away I've also started to think about things for when I come back (clearly the caveat there is 'IF I come back...'). I've found a lodger for september. That's quite a relief. She's French and is willing to pay the exorbitant prices I'm charging her. Hopefully she'll throw in some french lessons gratis.

And I'm halfway to finding a solution to my TV dilemma. Fox and CBS air their TV programmes on their websites - I should be able to keep up to speed with House and NCIS. Looks like that has secured my departure from these soggy shores.

School's out

Today is my last day at work. Not sure how I'm going to get through the day - think it's going to be a long one. I'm quite glad that I'm not going to be at work these last few days to be honest. There's so much going on, which is par for the course this time of year, but it's all so badly organsised. They have all year to plan for the end of term but it seems to come as a bit of a surprise when it actually gets here! If I haven't left then I'm doing the same again next year and take the last few days of school off. I'll make up a destination if I have to!

Bus Strikes

Well...Malta has ground to a bit of a halt because the hearses are on strike. Today the bus and cab drivers joined in the shenanigans and brought everything to a bit of a grinding halt. So-much-so that the Government have seen fit to provide 13 emergency bus services as of tomorrow. This does throw an interesting slant on my trip. I've been a big supporter of the transport system out there. The fact that a) they have one b) it gets to most parts of the island reasonably efficiently and c) it's so bloody affordable it makes me quite giddy just thining about it. However that's not the general feeling in Malta. I feel that if they spent some time in North East Kent they may revise their thoughts about their 'tardy' bus service. Reading their complaints though I think I would be quite frustrated - the bus drivers, apparently, make it up as they go along. However, the original strike was nothing to do with them - I'm not even sure they know why they're striking! Hopefully it'll all be resolved by the end of the week.

My hallway

Just on a slightly different tack I'm having my hallway done at the moment and it's going to be painted red - not all of it but there will be two accent walls. This is the red that I've chosen. What I love about this link is that you can zoom in on the colour. Handy :D

Packing

Tis true, I started to pack today. Well, pack in the sense that I was gathering together all my lovely new toiletries (girls, you know where I'm coming from here). I put them all in to different piles - hands, feet, face etc etc etc and then admired them before putting them into their own seperate bags (this is organisation at it's finest!). Don't you think there's something so satisfying about having lots of new toiletries for your hols - what a great excuse to go out and get them in the first place! What a pleasure it is to unpack at the other end and arrange them where you're staying, just waiting to be used. The only downside is that they're quite heavy. But Andrew won't mind carrying them I'm sure. He'll only need a pair of pants and a toothbrush anyway. However, I'm of the mind that I won't necessarily be bringing them back which means that there'll be lots of room for the other lovely things. I can recommend the nougat. Not a big fan generally but the stuff from Malta is pretty fab.

I do have a TV dilemma if someone wants to help me out here...I was going to turn off everything electrical in the house. In the interest of saving money and Being Green. That includes the PC, cooker, microwave the lot. However, House happened. New season starts Monday. In the absense of ER this is a medical drama that, absolutely without a doubt, I love. And...there's a continuing episode of NCIS next week...I'll just have to cancel Malta, there's no other option :/

And I must have missed something with the whole Branjelina thing. I thought she had her twins about 6 weeks ago - the papers even gave them names. What happenened? Have I found a parallel universe?

Scotney Castle

 
This is Scotney Castle. I love Scotney Castle. My garden looks just like that. No really it does. Thought that the blog needed brightening up a bit and as I don't have any current pictures of Malta then Scotney will have to do for the time being.

Dream

Had my first dream about being in Malta this morning. I was in a room with two other people. We were sitting at a table with the curtains partly closed as the sun was so bright. There was a box on the table with 15 compartments. The objects in the box were being counted in Maltese. I amazed my two companions by being able to remember the numbers, but I'd found it easy as they had counted using the French alphabet. Y was 15. I remember that.

Just looking at the 'Situations Vacant' small ads in The Times of Malta. Property consultants are required for several companies. One has requested that applicants must have own car and suit. Contact Darren.

The Elements

Just over a week to go and time is passing rapidly. I've got my TEFL certificates, factor 30 sun cream, swimming cossie and a few books. What more do I need to take for 6 weeks in Malta? Damn! I forgot my earthquake survival pack. And I thought that Malta was just some sleepy Mediterranean Island that got invaded occasionally by marauders and tourists, or by marauding tourists depending on who you speak to. Clearly not. Nobody said nothing about the earth shaking about. The Times of Malta has reported two, yes TWO, earthquakes by Malta and Gozo in recent days. Malta even has it's own seismic department! And by the way, if anyone's thinking about going to Southern Greece on their hols...well, don't.

Results: Pass or Fail?

After all the tidying up and blood, sweat and tears I actually bloody passed the first part of the TEFL course. Hurrah. I got a certificate and everyfink. Still plodding through the grammar module though. On to future tenses. Yes, it IS as boring as it sounds. There could be future generations of Europeans, taught by me, who are unable to get work, because I gave them the wrong participle for the future progressive tense...or something...Oh, the responsibilities I bear. I shall be burdened by this cross when I go to Malta...as if...